Two straws in a bottle…

Two straws in a bottle…

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67 thoughts on “Two straws in a bottle…” by RemiRoy (@RemiRoy)

  1. Avatar of Lade
    Lade (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Lovely story. You did a great job of walking us through their growing love. The end is also nice, we know the outcome without you having to spell it out

  2. Fred Nwonwu (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Nice one. I was left with a cool feeling after reading (hope that is a good thing?). A love story, well told and straight forward. I know the ladies will love this for sure.

  3. beautiful (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    me likey!

  4. remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    thanks guys.

    @Fred. a very good thing that is. lol

  5. Avatar of Myne
    Myne (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Very sweet for sure, it made me smile. Chi should find the words soon oo, lol.

  6. Ify O. (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    nice one! i envy ur narrative style.

  7. ayo akinwale (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Reading the story felt like a smooth scenic ride in the countryside, gradually enjoying the view till you got to the destination. Almost wished I was one of the participants. lol!

    1. Avatar of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

      Ay, thanks for the comment. been trying to reach you tho. but no show.

  8. labtimy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Great job!what are interesting story!.

  9. temitope (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    i love this, sorry maybe because am a hopeless romantic, makes you imagine “and they lived happily ever after”…..nice

  10. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @all, Tnx a lot, i appreciate that.

  11. Abe Magik (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    ROY

    i have only 3 words for u

    I Love U.

    keep it up girl

  12. Berri (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    mmh! very nice write up! just wondering what the young folk is still waiting for. maybe the next episode will do justice to that. very good thriller.

  13. Toyin (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Nice Story line…. Ow long did it take u 2 put this together? we’ll talk dear….

    Kipitup!!!!!

  14. lekside (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    A nice love story.

  15. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @Magik… i’m so loving u too for being far too kind!

    Thanx everyone

  16. oyefaj (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Really lovely story..

    Weldone Remi!

  17. kay9 (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Me likey! Me really really likey! But that last paragraph has a little error (at least so i think…)

    “… to find those (e)very words…”

  18. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    You righty! I hide my face in mild shame. Lol. I wonder if its posible to edit a published story here. Cld do it on d previous site. Tnx kay9!

  19. Avatar of Admin
    Admin (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Hi Remi, you can log in to your dashboard and edit the stories you’ve posted.

  20. Avatar of Dekky
    Dekky (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Nice one. I had a good laugh.

  21. i wish i was the guy in the story, at least for the girl liking him. Nice story.

  22. Avatar of Sope
    Sope (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Absolutely fantastic!!!!!! I almost cried at the agbalumo bit..lol!

  23. Avatar of kay9
    kay9 (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Just re-read this story again and something struck me: why’s the guy’s ringtone ‘Implication’? What’s he implicating? Lol…

  24. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @kay9. Loool! I gues i just fell in love wit d ‘olele’ part of d song. Had to squeeze it in somewhere…

  25. Avatar of Anderson Paul
    Anderson Paul (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    real cool story.
    i feel it could lead to a very nice novel you know,just an idea.

  26. Avatar of abby
    abby (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Well done Remi; its a beautiful story (sniff)

  27. Avatar of estrella
    estrella (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I sigh…with contentment! your story just makes me feel light;i ahd a goofy grin on my face by the time i was through with the story.The girl reminds me of me kinda..lol!
    Yoir narrative style is off the hook…easy going and flowing..no hitches..i definitley like!

  28. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    wow, tnx a lot! I’m glad you like it. thank you, thank you, thank you…..
    @paul. i kinda like your idea. :)
    @abby. tnx aplenty!

  29. Avatar of 2cute4u
    2cute4u (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    breathtaking.. my ideal end..

  30. Avatar of Afronuts
    Afronuts (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    For moment i thought this was a love story between two girls until where She calls him dude. I guess I got carried away by mixing the author with the first person narrative of Chi.

    But I LOVE this story…It gave my tummy that jittery feeling you get when you’ve met the girl of your dreams and you’re wondering how to break it to her…I could so much relate with Chi…

    I also love the verisimilude of the story – its realistic and a lot of guys go through similar experiences.

    Lovely story…Good characterisation!

  31. Avatar of Jaywriter
    Jaywriter (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Good story. The guy’d take things slowly. Rich girl, poor guy… not too sure. Mum just likes. Who wouldn’t like a girl who brings back her daughter home after two years. Talented writing, leaves it at a point where we can see a happily ever after or a ‘met this guys why me was over there’ thing. Keep it up.

  32. Avatar of Jaywriter
    Jaywriter (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Who wouldn’t like a boy who brings her daughter home after two year.

  33. Avatar of
    ce ug (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    A very sweet narrative about people about to harvest their quietly nurtured love. I particularly like that it’s not too chick-flik-ish.

  34. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    hmmm, ‘about to harvest their quietly nurtured love’. i like the way that sounds.
    tnx, ce ug. nice name btw.

    tnx everyone.

  35. Avatar of Diva Divine
    Diva Divine (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I love this..very simple minded and cute…CHi is Cute, i hope he has the guts to follow his heart and she doesnt mess with his…

  36. Avatar of ediye
    ediye (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    This is really good i must say….ur narative style made it touchy….i like the ‘udara’ session tho I must confess I tot she wud somehow die & CHI was just reminiscenting of what it was like before TOBI’s death…lol!..nice wrap up.

  37. Avatar of
    Funmi (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I like I like I like a lot! Very well-written, and their romance is believable without the “beating you over the head” feeling one typically gets from short romance stories these days.

  38. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @DD, Ediye & funmi. thanks a gazillion. i appreciate the comments.

  39. Avatar of Keemie
    Keemie (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Lovely story, will this story be continued.

  40. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    hmmm, continued? well, not sure yet. but i could try.

    tnx dearie.

  41. Avatar of Keemie
    Keemie (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Lovely story. I’ll love to read more

  42. Avatar of Mercy Ilevbare
    Mercy Ilevbare (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Awwww….love it through and through..the descriptions, the conversations , everything! Well done!

  43. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Tnx Mercy. I appreciate that very much. Glad you like it!

  44. Avatar of Zino Asalor
    Zino Asalor (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    . Totally enjoyed this! Not really one for romance but this story sucked me in, I felt like “him” being with Tobi, that perfect girl. Nice one

  45. Avatar of cikko907
    cikko907 (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Dear me, that was something. I smiled all the way through. Reminds me an eerie bit of myself. Awesome stuff…

  46. Avatar of dwisebaba
    dwisebaba (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Beautiful, left me feeling all warm all over.

  47. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Tnx guys. I really do appreciate the kind comments. Really glad you like this.

  48. Avatar of treasured1
    treasured1 (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Love it….A wonderful narrative you’ve got there….

    He should find the word in time ooo….

    1. Avatar of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

      I’m sure he will, with that much inspiration sitting across the table. lol.
      Thanks John.

  49. Avatar of Ellie
    Ellie (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Love this your Tobi character, correct girl jo! lol. Nice story and since he can think it, the words are there already.

    1. Avatar of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

      Ha, Elly, does she sound familiar? lol. I love spirited people, I guess that’s why I made her so.
      and I agree, the words are there already!.
      Thanks girl.

  50. Avatar of gretel
    gretel (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    My lady Roy,I’m surprised I didn’t see my comment here and to imagine I’ve read it thrice,this was so beautiful,so so beautiful,wish I’d be that lucky.
    You rock girl,you rock.

    1. Avatar of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

      Your Royal fineness :), Thanks a lot. Glad you like it that much.

  51. Wow, I love this. It’s so, so real and touching. Good work Remi! I don’t know you but I like you already.

  52. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    RealLy? I almost forgot this story was here. Lol. Thanks Pinkette, glad you like it. You’re so nice, I like you too! :)

  53. Avatar of Prince Ajubo
    Prince Ajubo (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Mmm…good stuff.No verbosity,just straight down like a good shot from a skillful snooker player.I also luv the chatty conversational flow.However,it would do with a little less colloqiality.

  54. Ok Rem, you aim to rise abi? With this sweet tale you got to the sky….make I see where you go go next! Well done gal…

  55. Avatar of shaifamily
    shaifamily (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Another one out of the BLUES.
    The guy sounds just like someone I knew…and the story like one I know very well.

  56. Avatar of adams
    adams (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    woww! this is wh
    at i so want in a prose – tie me to read to the end. i did without knowing i did. the present continuous narrative style makes me feel as if i am Achi the guy. i love the story

  57. Avatar of 11degrees
    11degrees (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I most definately will not forgive my self if i don’t commend your writing skill. It’s amazing.

  58. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Thanks guys. I really appreciate the comments. I was just getting the hang of proper writing when I wrote this. I’m glad nobody has mentioned the punctuation issues up in here. But I wouldn’t edit it for a billion dollars, at least not here. Keeps me grounded.
    Cheers!

  59. Avatar of chemokopi
    chemokopi (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Awwww…did it have to stop? (‘story-sick right now’) Nice job! I forgot I was reading; the words sublimed into very strong visuals. Its incredible how you were able to use words to conjure up such amazing imagery. And the chemistry-that was some good one.

    Honestly I can’t fault this. Keep it up!

  60. Avatar of Eletrika
    Eletrika (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    If I don’t comment on this, I’ll fall sick. Wow, this is SPLENDID!!! Although, I spotted two irregularities of tenses. ‘Stood’by the car and ‘I thought of it and smiled’. You’re already there dude. If you go further than this, you’ll blow us up!

  61. Avatar of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Thanks Eletrika. There are many irregularities in this piece o. But I’m glad peeps think the story is engaging. Makes me feel a lil better. :)

  62. Avatar of Bubbllinna
    Bubbllinna (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I love the simplicity and flow of the story..Well done nd Congrats..

  63. Nice Story Babe, Lv D Flow Nd Write Up Esp On The Love Reminds Me Of Some Pple I Used To Knw, Lol

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