67 thoughts on “Two straws in a bottle…” by RemiRoy (@RemiRoy)

  1. Profile photo of Lade
    Lade (@Lade-A): Scribe - 12732 pts

    Lovely story. You did a great job of walking us through their growing love. The end is also nice, we know the outcome without you having to spell it out

  2. Fred Nwonwu (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Nice one. I was left with a cool feeling after reading (hope that is a good thing?). A love story, well told and straight forward. I know the ladies will love this for sure.

  3. beautiful (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    me likey!

  4. remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    thanks guys.

    @Fred. a very good thing that is. lol

  5. Profile photo of Myne
    Myne (@Myne): Senior Scribe - 29705 pts

    Very sweet for sure, it made me smile. Chi should find the words soon oo, lol.

  6. Ify O. (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    nice one! i envy ur narrative style.

  7. ayo akinwale (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Reading the story felt like a smooth scenic ride in the countryside, gradually enjoying the view till you got to the destination. Almost wished I was one of the participants. lol!

    1. Profile photo of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

      Ay, thanks for the comment. been trying to reach you tho. but no show.

  8. labtimy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Great job!what are interesting story!.

  9. temitope (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    i love this, sorry maybe because am a hopeless romantic, makes you imagine “and they lived happily ever after”…..nice

  10. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @all, Tnx a lot, i appreciate that.

  11. Abe Magik (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    ROY

    i have only 3 words for u

    I Love U.

    keep it up girl

  12. Berri (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    mmh! very nice write up! just wondering what the young folk is still waiting for. maybe the next episode will do justice to that. very good thriller.

  13. Toyin (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Nice Story line…. Ow long did it take u 2 put this together? we’ll talk dear….

    Kipitup!!!!!

  14. lekside (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    A nice love story.

  15. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @Magik… i’m so loving u too for being far too kind!

    Thanx everyone

  16. oyefaj (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Really lovely story..

    Weldone Remi!

  17. kay9 (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    Me likey! Me really really likey! But that last paragraph has a little error (at least so i think…)

    “… to find those (e)very words…”

  18. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    You righty! I hide my face in mild shame. Lol. I wonder if its posible to edit a published story here. Cld do it on d previous site. Tnx kay9!

  19. Profile photo of Admin
    Admin (@ogaoga): Senior Scribe - 24141 pts

    Hi Remi, you can log in to your dashboard and edit the stories you’ve posted.

  20. Profile photo of Dekky
    Dekky (@Dekky): Junior Writer - 1075 pts

    Nice one. I had a good laugh.

  21. Profile photo of Amurawaiye Adeyinka
    Amurawaiye Adeyinka (@adeyinkacu): Junior Writer - 3811 pts

    i wish i was the guy in the story, at least for the girl liking him. Nice story.

  22. Profile photo of Sope
    Sope (@sope): Newbie - 144 pts

    Absolutely fantastic!!!!!! I almost cried at the agbalumo bit..lol!

  23. Profile photo of kay9
    kay9 (@kay9): Beginner - 772 pts

    Just re-read this story again and something struck me: why’s the guy’s ringtone ‘Implication’? What’s he implicating? Lol…

  24. Remiroy (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    @kay9. Loool! I gues i just fell in love wit d ‘olele’ part of d song. Had to squeeze it in somewhere…

  25. Profile photo of Anderson Paul
    Anderson Paul (@Anderson-paul): Senior Scribe - 24703 pts

    real cool story.
    i feel it could lead to a very nice novel you know,just an idea.

  26. Profile photo of abby
    abby (@abby): Junior Writer - 3531 pts

    Well done Remi; its a beautiful story (sniff)

  27. Profile photo of estrella
    estrella (@estrella): Scribe - 16453 pts

    I sigh…with contentment! your story just makes me feel light;i ahd a goofy grin on my face by the time i was through with the story.The girl reminds me of me kinda..lol!
    Yoir narrative style is off the hook…easy going and flowing..no hitches..i definitley like!

  28. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    wow, tnx a lot! I’m glad you like it. thank you, thank you, thank you…..
    @paul. i kinda like your idea. :)
    @abby. tnx aplenty!

  29. Profile photo of 2cute4u
    2cute4u (@2cute4u): Junior Writer - 3711 pts

    breathtaking.. my ideal end..

  30. Profile photo of Afronuts
    Afronuts (@Afronuts): Head Wordsmith - 64807 pts

    For moment i thought this was a love story between two girls until where She calls him dude. I guess I got carried away by mixing the author with the first person narrative of Chi.

    But I LOVE this story…It gave my tummy that jittery feeling you get when you’ve met the girl of your dreams and you’re wondering how to break it to her…I could so much relate with Chi…

    I also love the verisimilude of the story – its realistic and a lot of guys go through similar experiences.

    Lovely story…Good characterisation!

  31. Profile photo of Jaywriter
    Jaywriter (@jaywriter): Junior Writer - 1913 pts

    Good story. The guy’d take things slowly. Rich girl, poor guy… not too sure. Mum just likes. Who wouldn’t like a girl who brings back her daughter home after two years. Talented writing, leaves it at a point where we can see a happily ever after or a ‘met this guys why me was over there’ thing. Keep it up.

  32. Profile photo of Jaywriter
    Jaywriter (@jaywriter): Junior Writer - 1913 pts

    Who wouldn’t like a boy who brings her daughter home after two year.

  33. Profile photo of
    ce ug (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    A very sweet narrative about people about to harvest their quietly nurtured love. I particularly like that it’s not too chick-flik-ish.

  34. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    hmmm, ‘about to harvest their quietly nurtured love’. i like the way that sounds.
    tnx, ce ug. nice name btw.

    tnx everyone.

  35. Profile photo of Diva Divine
    Diva Divine (@divadivine): Junior Writer - 1398 pts

    I love this..very simple minded and cute…CHi is Cute, i hope he has the guts to follow his heart and she doesnt mess with his…

  36. Profile photo of ediye
    ediye (@ediye): Newbie - 0 pts

    This is really good i must say….ur narative style made it touchy….i like the ‘udara’ session tho I must confess I tot she wud somehow die & CHI was just reminiscenting of what it was like before TOBI’s death…lol!..nice wrap up.

  37. Profile photo of
    Funmi (@): Newbie - 0 pts

    I like I like I like a lot! Very well-written, and their romance is believable without the “beating you over the head” feeling one typically gets from short romance stories these days.

  38. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    @DD, Ediye & funmi. thanks a gazillion. i appreciate the comments.

  39. Profile photo of Keemie
    Keemie (@imek26): Newbie - 60 pts

    Lovely story, will this story be continued.

  40. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    hmmm, continued? well, not sure yet. but i could try.

    tnx dearie.

  41. Profile photo of Keemie
    Keemie (@imek26): Newbie - 60 pts

    Lovely story. I’ll love to read more

  42. Profile photo of Mercy Ilevbare
    Mercy Ilevbare (@efearue): Junior Writer - 3110 pts

    Awwww….love it through and through..the descriptions, the conversations , everything! Well done!

  43. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    Tnx Mercy. I appreciate that very much. Glad you like it!

  44. Profile photo of Zino Asalor
    Zino Asalor (@zinzino): Newbie - 90 pts

    . Totally enjoyed this! Not really one for romance but this story sucked me in, I felt like “him” being with Tobi, that perfect girl. Nice one

  45. Profile photo of cikko907
    cikko907 (@cikko907): Writer - 6824 pts

    Dear me, that was something. I smiled all the way through. Reminds me an eerie bit of myself. Awesome stuff…

  46. Profile photo of dwisebaba
    dwisebaba (@dwise4life): Beginner - 952 pts

    Beautiful, left me feeling all warm all over.

  47. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    Tnx guys. I really do appreciate the kind comments. Really glad you like this.

  48. Profile photo of treasured1
    treasured1 (@treasured1): Junior Writer - 4481 pts

    Love it….A wonderful narrative you’ve got there….

    He should find the word in time ooo….

    1. Profile photo of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

      I’m sure he will, with that much inspiration sitting across the table. lol.
      Thanks John.

  49. Profile photo of Ellie
    Ellie (@elly): Writer - 9251 pts

    Love this your Tobi character, correct girl jo! lol. Nice story and since he can think it, the words are there already.

    1. Profile photo of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

      Ha, Elly, does she sound familiar? lol. I love spirited people, I guess that’s why I made her so.
      and I agree, the words are there already!.
      Thanks girl.

  50. Profile photo of gretel
    gretel (@gretel): Junior Writer - 2841 pts

    My lady Roy,I’m surprised I didn’t see my comment here and to imagine I’ve read it thrice,this was so beautiful,so so beautiful,wish I’d be that lucky.
    You rock girl,you rock.

    1. Profile photo of RemiRoy
      RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

      Your Royal fineness :), Thanks a lot. Glad you like it that much.

  51. Profile photo of pinkette dawn
    pinkette dawn (@pinkette): Junior Writer - 2391 pts

    Wow, I love this. It’s so, so real and touching. Good work Remi! I don’t know you but I like you already.

  52. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    RealLy? I almost forgot this story was here. Lol. Thanks Pinkette, glad you like it. You’re so nice, I like you too! :)

  53. Profile photo of Prince Ajubo
    Prince Ajubo (@elyone): Junior Writer - 2980 pts

    Mmm…good stuff.No verbosity,just straight down like a good shot from a skillful snooker player.I also luv the chatty conversational flow.However,it would do with a little less colloqiality.

  54. Profile photo of irenecarew-bako
    irenecarew-bako (@irenecarewbako): Writer - 6530 pts

    Ok Rem, you aim to rise abi? With this sweet tale you got to the sky….make I see where you go go next! Well done gal…

  55. Profile photo of shaifamily
    shaifamily (@shaifamily): Head Wordsmith - 40972 pts

    Another one out of the BLUES.
    The guy sounds just like someone I knew…and the story like one I know very well.

  56. Profile photo of adams
    adams (@coshincozor): Scribe - 13390 pts

    woww! this is wh
    at i so want in a prose – tie me to read to the end. i did without knowing i did. the present continuous narrative style makes me feel as if i am Achi the guy. i love the story

  57. Profile photo of 11degrees
    11degrees (@11degrees): Beginner - 534 pts

    I most definately will not forgive my self if i don’t commend your writing skill. It’s amazing.

  58. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    Thanks guys. I really appreciate the comments. I was just getting the hang of proper writing when I wrote this. I’m glad nobody has mentioned the punctuation issues up in here. But I wouldn’t edit it for a billion dollars, at least not here. Keeps me grounded.
    Cheers!

  59. Profile photo of chemokopi
    chemokopi (@chemokopi): Head Wordsmith - 282298 pts

    Awwww…did it have to stop? (‘story-sick right now’) Nice job! I forgot I was reading; the words sublimed into very strong visuals. Its incredible how you were able to use words to conjure up such amazing imagery. And the chemistry-that was some good one.

    Honestly I can’t fault this. Keep it up!

  60. Profile photo of Eletrika
    Eletrika (@babyada): Wordsmith - 36785 pts

    If I don’t comment on this, I’ll fall sick. Wow, this is SPLENDID!!! Although, I spotted two irregularities of tenses. ‘Stood’by the car and ‘I thought of it and smiled’. You’re already there dude. If you go further than this, you’ll blow us up!

  61. Profile photo of RemiRoy
    RemiRoy (@RemiRoy): Writer - 8687 pts

    Thanks Eletrika. There are many irregularities in this piece o. But I’m glad peeps think the story is engaging. Makes me feel a lil better. :)

  62. Profile photo of Bubbllinna
    Bubbllinna (@sibbylwhyte): Head Wordsmith - 123425 pts

    I love the simplicity and flow of the story..Well done nd Congrats..

  63. Profile photo of Princes Arah
    Princes Arah (@sarah): Scribe - 11607 pts

    Nice Story Babe, Lv D Flow Nd Write Up Esp On The Love Reminds Me Of Some Pple I Used To Knw, Lol

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